Sunday, July 30

FYI

You know how you sometimes see that Crystal Light knockoff when you're cruising the aisles at Walmart? You know how you tried most of the flavors that you thought looked appealing, and decided that Raspberry and Cherry weren't really all they were cracked up to be, and then you decided to stick with the Lemonade and the Grape, because really when it comes down to it, you'd be the kid in the Sunny D commercial at the back who's really going to go for the Purple Stuff when they offer it? Well, there might be some symptoms that come along with your drinking huge quantities of the purple stuff, and I thought I might save you a search on the medical sites to find the answer.

Generic Grape Crystal Light will totally make your poop green.

That is all.

Saturday, July 29

B was Upstairs

Mom: "Hey! The dog is humping your leg!"

Sarah: "YAAAHHH! (Flips dog gently onto back and makes him look her in the eye. Is dominant, no matter what it looks like to his weenie.)"

Mom: "(laughing) What does Bruce think of that?"

Sarah: "Oh, he does it to him, too. It depends on his mood. (thinking) ...You know, you can actually feel him about to do it if you catch him at it. His muscles get all tense and, I don't know, purposeful, you know what I mean? You can totally see it in his face that he's about to start humping."

Mom: "What? Huck? Or B?"

Wednesday, July 26

Animal House

My dad came home for lunch this week with a scrape on his knee and another on his ankle. Apparently, the people he was hefting a giant table with both decided to let go of their end(s) at the same time, leaving my dad with the whole table to drop on hisself.

Huck was very concerned that entire day, nosing around the wounds and trying to make sure that my dad would be ok. He's fine, as far as I know, but the way that the dog was worried warms my heart.

*edited* Huck is being more attached than usual - which is a huge feat for a mama's dog, to be more attached than usual - and Linus the cat is following me around.

I love them both more than is healthy, but this is driving me a little bit nuts, you know? *edited*

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I haven't been talking about the animals as much, but I have to vent a little bit. Huck has taken (since we've moved) to sometimes running off and smelling things and totally ignoring us as he does. I know this is mostly a hound thing - he's off smelling things and they totally take over his brain - but I also know it's partly him deliberately disobeying us. It wouldn't bother me so much, but he's not afraid of the streets yet - no car has come by while he's "exploring" - so I'm worried that he'll be hit by a car. It's not that he's fast, because he's not really fast, it's more that he's wiley and can do a 180 on us when we try to catch him. Any suggestions?

Linus is adjusting very well to having three stories to explore. Once he mastered the idea of a staircase, he very much liked the idea of them. I watched him, and you could almost see the wheels a-turnin'. He very much likes this method of defying gravity to build levels upon levels.

Sunday, July 23

Ok, Ok, No More Telegraph

I thought it was fun. Maybe I wore you all out with the very long-ness of it all? But you see, when I started it, it was going to be a small post detailing how we were home and I didn't feel like typing very much because, well, moving sucks. Don't ever move. But then I got started and I couldn't stop telling you all about the stuff we'd done. And it went on from there. I've got a few things I want to say to friends of mine:

  • Jess is back from Florida and is in much better spirits than I would be after a trip to the Sunshine State if said trip was spent trapsing from softball field to softball field. Then again, it was for her lovely little sister, and given the chance, I would enthusiastically trapse around any state with my little brother to see all manners of musicals. If softball was his thing, I'd probably be just as excited.
  • Also Jessica has just reappeared in the US, after an extended stay in GENEVA. For serious. She had a great time and met all sorts of cool people. She and I had at least one very funny instant message session wherein she was very disturbed at her choice of debauchery, but I think I assured her enough that she had done absolutely nothing wrong.
  • Another friend of ours has recently made a giant change in his life, moving from The Patch to Wyoming. Bruce and I are really happy to see him doing good. Keep your fingers crossed for him, but I'm sure he'll be fine. Better than fine. Awesome.
  • We're really missing Cap. That's about all there is to it.

Lisa, Todd, Mason, Sky and I went tubing down the Wolf RED last week. Our route took us past the Noviciate, where there's a pretty big waterfall which we got out of the water to avoid. On our short trek across the land, we found a perfectly good inner tube with a not-so-perfectly good plastic tube inside of it, nestled in with a perfectly good cooler. All of that could be explained. (Eg: maybe some rich people decided they were flatlanders and were too lame to take the cooler with them, and were too dumb to detatch them and just left them on the side of the river. Or perhaps there was a random sex episode, after which they just forgot to take their perfectly good stuff before launching off.) None of this, we all agreed, explained the fact that they'd left their perfectly good beer in the cooler when they left it behind. Obviously, something terrible had happened to these people. After all, who leaves their beer behind? It was pretty scary. Even more scary were the flip-flops that floated ominiously at the bottom of the falls. Naturally, we took the whole lot with us when we left. The cooler has been dubbed, naturally, the Dead Man's Chest. Aye, matey, we made merry with the dead man's beer, too.

Then, on Friday, my cousin's little girl had her first birthday. She was very excited and very happy with the gift I knitted for her. I didn't get any pictures (Bruce stole the batteries for my camera to put in his mouse, and I haven't bought any since), but just picture Kate with grey fur and dark blue stripes on light blue britches. I was a little worried that Hannah might be alarmed by Kate's masculinity, so I gave her a pink nose and a yarn bow on top of her head. Oh, before you get confused, Hannah turned six on Friday. It was her first birthday because before now, her parents weren't of the sort that celebrated holidays. (Don't look so confused, I'm sure everyone has Jehovah's Witness relatives. Don't you?) I worried and worried that she might not like it, because it was, after all, a homemade gift, and not nearly as cool as a Bratz doll or something, but she warmed my heart but good when she loved it right away. Her mom told her it was "made from scratch" and she's done a good job of making sure Hannah is really appreciative. Wow, it was so great. She seemed to like it almost as much as the fluffy white puppy she got from someone else (she named the puppy "Princess", because she's the "Queen"). She named the knitted cat "Harley". It's not quite as feminine, but it's exponentially cooler, and I'm happy. Two minutes after they arrived I wondered where Bruce was. When I looked down to the water (we were visiting at the Lake), I saw that they were all on the dock, Hannah on one side of him and Phillip on the other. In the sunset it made quite a picture.

So, that's what we've been up to. Much wine was bedranken on Friday night, much chatting was done with Hannah. ("Now that I'm six, I'm soooo much closer to dying," she said with a huge sigh.) She informed me that I don't look anything like my mom and dad (which I knew) and also that there was no way that Robby could be my little brother. ("He's like THIS MUCH bigger than you!" was her comment.) The great news is that now we live about 10 minutes away from them, and we can visit as often as we like.

I hope everyone had a great weekend!

Wednesday, July 19

HELLO STOP

WE HAVE ARRIVED STOP EVERYTHING IS EVERYWHERE STOP YOU KNOW WHAT'S WORSE THAN MOVING STOP ITS MOVING INTO A PLACE THAT IS ALREADY FULL OF STUFF STOP I WENT TUBING WITH LISA ON MONDAY STOP TUBING IS SORT OF LIKE A FORM OF FLOATING FOR YOU MISSOURI PEOPLE STOP WE GOT CABLE AND THE INTERNET HOOKED UP TODAY STOP YOU WOULDNT BELIEVE ALL THE CRAZY CHANNELS YOU GET ON EXAPANDED BASIC UP HERE STOP LIKE FOR INSTANCE THE VIDEO GAME CHANNEL STOP ARE YOU WATCHING PROJECT RUNWAY YET STOP WHY NOT STOP DO IT STOP BECAUSE I TOLD YOU TO STOP HUCKLEBERRY AND LINUS ARE BEING SPOILED ROTTEN BY THEIR GRANDPARENTS STOP I ALREADY MADE AN ASS OF MYSELF AT A LOCAL BAR STOP THERES NO PLACE LIKE HOME TO MAKE AN ASS OF MYSELF AT A BAR STOP WE JUST GOT BACK FROM OUR FIRST WALK WHERE I SHOWED BRUCE ALL OF THE IMPORTANT THINGS LIKE WHERE I TOOK SWIMMING LESSONS AND DAVE WAS THERE AND HE TAUGHT ME HOW TO SWIM AND BRUCE THOUGHT THAT WAS PRETTY COOL STOP WE ALSO SAW THE CANDY STORE SLASH OFFICE SUPPLY STORE SLASH JOCK SHOP STOP THESE PEOPLE REALLY LIKE TO MAXIMIZE THEIR SPACE STOP

Friday, July 14

Moving Day

I've resorted to packing in suitcases* and throwing loose things into them as I wander around the house. In less than an hour, I'll be watching Bruce and Mac (who took the day off of work to help us, thanks Mac!) heft everything we own into a Penske truck. While they're loading things up, I'll be cleaning behind them. It's sort of like horses in a parade. You know what I'm getting at.

I plan to leave the place sparkly and nice for our landlord, because you know what? He let us out of our lease. It's months early, but I told him our situation, and he's letting us out of our lease. It figures that the best landlord I will ever have, I only had for a few months, don't you agree? He also told me a few days ago that he wants to make sure he's got our forwarding address, in case they rent the place out really fast, so they can send me what's left of our deposit. I had to stare at him with my mouth agape - you just have to in that situation, it's required.

Dudes, have you tried this Magic Eraser deal? If you're moving, get the Extra Strength one. I thought it was all bunk, because the commercials are too hokey - I was sure it was a scam or something, but then I used one at work and it REALLY IS MAGIC. REALLY. I brought one home last night and it took off 90% of the marks on the walls (the insides of closets get lots of marks) and it's a miracle and it will get so many more people back their deposits. Everyone should buy one if they're renting. When they're moving, I mean.

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*Once upon a time, I lived with some boys who had hardly enough money. These boys would take their grocery bags (the plastic ones, mainly) and store them between the stove and the refridgerator. Every few days, one of them would be off to visit someone or play a gig somewhere, and they's shout in to whoever was in the kitchen (probably getting a beer), "Hey! Grab my suitcase!"

The designated person would come back from the kitchen with a beer and a grocery bag. That's the sort of "suitcase" I'm packing in today. (I knew they'd come in handy one day...)

Monday, July 10

And I Chose to Live Here

Hey, guess what? If you have some sort of insect bite for a long while and it's not a mosquito bite and you're really not sure what it might be, and so you ask your husband what he thinks it is because he's lived down here much longer than you have and you're telling yourself that it might be chiggers but you're not going to worry about that until it's confirmed by someone else and then he confirms it and so you do a google search for chiggers and you see some rather disgusting pictures and realize that yes, you have been bitten by a chigger or several, and at least you're feeling a little relieved because you know what's causing the open lesions on your leg(s) and stomach, so you can rest easy, don't go ahead and read this page.

It won't make you feel any better about chiggers.

Friday, July 7

Paradise

Recently, I called the state I hail from "the land of ice and snow". I want to clarify things now, and let you know I'm not all about the ice and snow, but I will definitely put up with it in exchange for some other things that are available in Wisconsin.

  1. Like beer. Wisconsin is a land of beer. Not because it's made there, because there are plenty of other states where beer is a primary export. It's because of the support of the beer. Wisconsinites are fond of their beer, and they aren't ashamed to show it.
  2. The Packers. There's nothing like growing up in a culture that idolizes their sports team. In Missouri, we have the Cardinals. I already love the Cards, and baseball just isn't my thing. Imagine then, how I feel about the Packers, when they embody football and a greater image and ideology that can't be beat? It's amazing.
  3. Cheese. Cheese is my manna, and if there was one thing I could eat every single day without purposely starving myself, cheese would be that thing. I'd have totally starved in that damned desert. PS: Were there no animals to hunt? I mean, seriously. Every desert has animals, and even if it were a religious thing (can't kill them Kosher and all), then would be the time to bend that little rule.
  4. The music scene is fantastic in Wisconsin. Everyone I know knows someone (personally) that plays in a band. I know several, from several different bands. There's always a local live band to see, no matter where you are.
  5. Last but not least, my family and everyone I knew and loved up until a little over a year ago live in Wisconsin. It's just one of those things.

We're moving to Wisconsin next Friday. We have the Penske truck rented, and we're packing up this weekend. (Probably next week, too. We like to pack over the course of as long a period of time as available to us.)

On the trip up, we'll be stopping in St. Louis (or just outside of there) to hang out for a night or two on the town. Anyone who's interested should drop us a line, and we'll set up a fabulous place for drinking beer and scavenging what cheese we can find in this dry state. Come on, it'll be fun! Send me an email, and we'll talk. My email remains, as always, sunnyfreakingday (AT) gmail (DOT) com.

Tuesday, July 4

Happy independence/dependence Day

We the people of the United States, in order to form a more perfect union, establish justice, insure domestic tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general welfare, and secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves and our posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.


We the people of this marriage, in order to form a more perfect union, establish justice, INSURE DOMESTIC TRANQUILITY, provide for the common defense, PROMOTE THE GENERAL WELFARE, and secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves and our posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of Our Marriage.

We're thinking of doing something that's been debated for a long, long time. Please wish us well in our decision-making, and in our follow-through. There may come a time in the near future when I'm posting from my "home", wherein by "home" I may or may not mean "the home I grew up in" rather than "the home I live in at this moment". Whatever happens, be assured that we have thought things through to the utmost, and that we are going to continue to not be swayed by Public Opinion.

(Unless Public Opinion is the sort which will definitely bring us to Wisconsin. In that case, Public Opinion will be much the same as the Word of God. I will personally be accepting any Public Opinions that suggest Wisconsin as Gold, to Not be Reckoned With.)

For those who may be confused, we are currently a one-income household once again, whereby I am really resenting the people who have not been giving me more hours because although they are old, they should not be so stuck in their ways as to not understand how completely needy I am.

Disregard this post if it doesn't make sense. I may or may not have partook in more than a few glasses of wine before writing. I'm just sayin'.

Monday, July 3

Conversation

"Do you smell poop? I smell poop. The dog's on the bed. Was it you? I don't see any poop. Did you poop? Is that what I'm smelling? Did you poop, or was it the dog? Tell me the truth, so I can look for it. Help me find the poop"

RCMP

Or Mounties, for most of us. They can be awfully intimidating. Brown posted a really funny story yesterday, and it totally reminded me of my experience with the RCMP in Toronto. Sadly, I don't have the picture that was taken, but I've speculated on what it probably looks like many many times, and this is the closest I can figure:

Forums

I've been absorbed in the online forums the past month or two. It's a little riduculous, I'd forgotten how into themselves these people actually are, and how condescending they are to any and all new people. I let them get to me for a while, making me feel like crap for no good reason at all, but I've turned things around (and I've been there for more than a few weeks) and I like to think that I'm starting to prove my place in the (self-indulgent, holier-than-thou) world of forums.

I don't by any means suggest that you go there with a less-than-friendly or pitiful attitude for APBTs (American Pit Bull Terriers), or that you do anything but read and ask innocent questions unless you desire to be stomped out of your will to live, but if you're interested in some good advice from people who might not be the friendliest, I'd go to one of these places to read the archives.

There's one in particular I go to. Good luck, if you go too.

Saturday, July 1

Back in Black

A Fine Kettle of Fish: "After a brief 18-month hiatus, it would seem that I'm back in Blogland. Not that I particularly missed wasting time with a blog. As much as I'm for wasting time, I've been finding other ways of doing it that better suit me. But hey, I like to write, and I don't necessarily hate talking about my boring life, so why not get back to it?"



And if someone wanted me to change the template for their black blog into something that's more Sunny-friendly eye-wise, I'd be happy to switch it out to something a little less, how you say, blinding for them.

You know, just in case someone might be interested in that sort of thing.