Friday, March 11


How are you? I am fine.

Actually, I'm not. I'm the worst fiancee in the world. Really, I am. Let me tell you a little story about how lazy I really am. It's not only infected my bones, it's rooted itself through my ass, and into the chair.

I'm serious. As soon as I get insurance, I'm totally going to get these ass-roots checked into.

But anyway, I was telling you about my lazy-ocity. I was going to use another word, but when I spelt it, it looked wrong in every case. Lazyness? Laziness? Lazienyss? All look wrong to me today.

Ok, so I just got home from work. I waited about 1/2 hour, and then I called Bruce's cell phone, to see how he was doing. He's doing fine. Well, mostly. They're working. Just thought you'd want to know.

Anyway, they're taking a break right now.

Ok, so he's on the phone with me, and he asks if I got his note.

"What note?"

"The one that was right in front of your face when you walked in the door. The big, bright, yellow note. At eye level. The one that jumped out at your face when you came in."

"I don't see it."

"It's yellow."

"Oh, the big one? With writing on it? Ok, I see it."

And then he asked if I was coming over later. Yes, I am.

He wants me to bring him a pair of pants. I sat in confused silence for a few seconds. Why would he need pants? Why? Did he forget them at home? How did he leave the house without pants? I hope it's not Commando Tuesday. Then he explained.

Apparently, he had a child on his lap, and the child pissed on him. You heard me. On his lap.

So now his pants are all wet. He rinsed them off with water to dilute the pee. He wants to know if I'll bring him over some dry pants when I come over.

I'm the laziest fiancee in the world because I first agreed to come over straight away. I don't want my fiancee to have to marinade in someone else's pee for any amount of time. Jeez. What kind of person do you think I am?

But then, after I said that, I thought, "Man, I really want to sit around for a while, and post a big long post on my blog. Maybe I'll go over later." And then I said I'd be there in a few minutes, but instead I posted a big long story about how I'm letting my fiancee marinade in someone else's diluted pee while I type.

You know, I'm just like that.


B said...

I've got to hand it to you, you got over there pretty quickly. I wasn't at all worried you might fall asleep on the couch for a few hours and let me stay in pissy pants.

Princess Blogonoke said...

That's okay. You're not the only bad fiancee in the house. Sometimes, I call Stink Pants #5 at 3:00 am, just to tell him that I'm awake and I love him and stuff. He usually has to get up for work at 7:00.

I think he's gotten used to it after a year and a half.