This feeling I get when I meet someone new and I'm really really worried that I might say something terrible and make them hate me forever and ever but really it's not my fault, I just get really honest when I've been drinking. Really honest. And loud.
A few years ago, I was at a bar in my hometown and I ran across two people I went to grade school with. (I was going to say friends, haha, but I didn't really have any back then.) One of them had had a child fairly quickly after high school, a child which now lives with this girl's mother. Great parenting there, eh? But I don't know the full story, and that's just the rumor-about-town. So anyway, the other girl and I talked for a little while and I learned she was going to school to be a police-woman. I thought this was fantastic, and also asked if she was married, had any kids, etc, to which she said "No."
I was thrilled - besides Lisa and myself, I didn't really know of any girls our age who hadn't gotten pregnant to keep their boyfriend or as a drunken accident three weeks after graduation. "Good for you!" I bellered above the conversation at the bar, "Me neither! Here's to the only girls who didn't get knocked up!!!"
The police-woman-in-training looked furtively around and smiled a little bit before shushing me and excusing herself from our company. When I look back, that may not have been the smartest thing to say in a bar full of girls who got knocked up. But you know what they say
Anyway, I'm a little worried about this new girl who I might be spending a little bit of time with. You see, she's my age, and she has two little kids. Not that there's anything wrong with that. I'm
just a little honest. And loud.
"I'm SO GLAD I don't have two kids!"